What are you lookin at?

Good evening ladies and gentleman

Tis a saturday night and I ain't got nobody to quote my favorite muslim performer. My career is on fire since it is the weekend and all I have to look forward to is this blog and my son throwing up on me.

I was talking to a comic this afternoon and he wanted me to update this blog more often. We both have no careers other then trolling other comics websites ...so this story is for you.

It will not be often that I will trash talk many people on here since we all have more important things to do like clean out the gutters of our minds but here we go.

There are few things I hate other then hack comedy.

One is watching a comic come off stage or hear them bragging about their act, like they reinvented comedy or something. I am sorry but there is very little reinvention left in the world of show. I am not saying there are not people doing original comedy but it happens less and less.

The second thing I hate more then anything is when a comic throws stones from a glass house. Look motherfucker don't hack on me for an old reference or bit if your act is filled with more. I try not to hack on guys that may not have written much in the last ten years or updated their act but fuckface don't come at me if ...well you will see what I mean if a few secs.

The third thing I hate is when comics beat down on younger comics because they can. I guess for some it is hard to remember what is was like to suck for years and years. Some don't realize that they still suck and just figured out how to polish their suckiness to fool the audience. Yes don't mall kids have big pants har har. The streets of comedy are littered with stories of bigger comics using and abusing their power. I have always tried to punch up the comedy ladder ..so if I was the middle, I would never hack on the opener but I felt the headliner was open game if he was a prick or a hack.

The final thing I have a problem with is this: I hate it when comics verbally attack you or pick on you to see if you can fight back, and if you can then you are A-L-R-I-G-H-T. I might be alone on this one but ring ring recess is over fucktard. I don't have to prove myself to you offstage that I have game. This in not high school, there are no lockers to throw people in no racoon biting at my heals. This makes no sense...now I like to sling mud and hack on guys to their face like the rest of them but only once I get to know them and earn a little respect. See to me that is the key, figuring out what you can get away with and staying in the parameters.

Ok Ok so you are like, man I love this verbal circle jerk Darren.....oh you are the wise one. Here is where the trash talking starts. A comic came up to me a short time ago and said that a comic named John Wing Jr came up and said "What the fuck did I ever do to Darren Frost and why does he hate me so much" or something like that.

Now John Wing Jr if you don't know is one of canada's largest exports for comedy. He wears a bowtie, plays guitar and kinda looks like Sherman from the Rocky and Bullwinkle cartoon where the kid travels through time with the dog Dr Peabody. The guy has done five tonight shows and tons of other tv. I have to be honest and say that he has some great jokes and can do very well with the comedy crowds but you know what Fuck him. As a human being I would like to travel through time and cut out his mother's cunt to save us all from his bullshit.

When I was a much younger comic and a nicer guy I worked with John and he broke almost every rule I outlined above. He walks off stage every night thinking he invented comedy, hacked on me for an old reference in my act when his closer is a parody song of the wizard of Oz but what if they all got high oooooooohhhhh. Nice glass house John.

Finally all weekend he doesn't pick up on the go fuck yourself vibe and tries to jab to see if I would jab back. I hope you feel big John ....oh did you feel good and think you were so quickwitted. What's next you going to play jeopardy with retarded kids to feel intellectually superior.

Now I could bring up even more personal stuff and be even more evil but I won't. I will keep it above board but I can't wait to see John Wing, cause everytime I see him now I see a shadow of a man who has had karma kick him in the ass. We are all playing the same clubs so you can think your shit don't stink but it does ...it just has a bowtie around it.

I have been an asshole in the past and will be in the future where warranted but I always try to walk it like I talk it.

Oh and John, if you are reading this I am just waiting to see if you punch back so we can hang out.